Good Night, My Love
by Angeldust1
Summary: It's six years in the future, and the AI team have had their fill of the dangerous lives they lead.


Title:Good Night, My Love  
  
Rating:Pretty much general.  
  
Summary:It's six years in the future, and the AI gang have had their fill of the dangerous life that they live. A grim look at the future  
  
Disclaimer:I don't own anything. I wish I did, but Joss and Co. has the rights.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Cordelia almost didn't make it into the hotel, she was so tired. It was a deep tired that reached deep down into her soul. She was tired of everything. Tired of the battles, tired of the losses. Tired of not living a life for herself. Six years of the visions and the nightly dangers had taken their toll on her, as it had Gunn and Fred. They were all only shadows of who they once were.  
  
The hotel was silent as she stepped inside. Angel was probably out patrolling again. Gunn, she had no idea. Since Wesley had...had been killed three years ago, he'd slowly transformed from a street tough, lovable, adventurous guy into a cold, hardened man. Now, when he disappeared, he may be gone for days or hours. No one knew. No one really cared, sadly enough.  
  
"Fred?" Cordelia called softly through the darkness.   
  
When no one answered her, she sighed and turned on the lights of the lobby. So she was alone. It was just as well. She didn't feel like talking to anyone right now, as she rarely did. No, she was usually the one to shy away from the others, even though she used to be the most talkative one of them all, to an annoying extent. But not anymore. Words were pointless to her now.  
  
A sharp spike of pain shot through her skull, and Cordelia winced. Without hesitating, she reached into her purse for the bottle of pain pills the doctor had prescribed her a few months ago when she had gone to the doctor for a check up. They hadn't expected to find the tumor that had been growing on her brain for a month. Or rather, they had expected something, since the visions had been taking their horrible toll on her, but not that. Not cancer. What a price to pay for lending your services to the Good Side.   
  
She swallowed three pills down in one gulp from her water bottle. She had been taking more and more over time. The pills were becoming ineffective. Her body was building an immunity to them. One day, she knew what would happen. She knew that the pills would not work at all, that she would have to be bedridden. The inoperable tumor would take her life.   
  
At first, Cordelia had been mad at everything. Why her? Why like that? She had asked herself those questions over and over, but found no suitable answer to take away the desperate tears from her tired body. Not even Angel, who'd been through everything with her, could come up with an answer. He had simply held her for hours at a time, not speaking, just comforting her patiently until she had fallen into a deep, troubled sleep. It had happened so many times that Cordelia was numb now, not feeling anything anymore. Just an exhaustion that could only be answered with one thing. Death.  
  
And it wasn't like she hadn't thought of it plenty of times before. It would have been so easy...just take a few too many pills, and she could simply drift off peacefully, not a care in the cruel world.  
  
But she couldn't find the strength to do it. She still had reasons to stay, however few. Angel, for one. He would go insane with the guilt. As if he weren't already feeling his consience tugging at him for her condition. After all, she was his Seer. The visions were meant for him. She knew that she had to stay on the earth as long as possible for Angel, her best friend. Tragedy and destruction hadn't changed the fact that they were closer than just co-workers. They were people bound through experience, one soul to another. She knew him inside and out, and it had taken years to get that far. He knew her deepest secrets also, and they held a mutual trust that was so rare in these days.  
  
And Gunn, who hadn't let her break through the walls since Wesley's untimely death. He was so different than he used to be, so uncaring, yet she knew that he needed her to help him squeak by through the hard days, just as he helped her just by being alive. That's all it took nowadays. Just staying alive. But sometimes, it was too much to hope for. It had been for Wesley.  
  
Fred was her younger sister, in a way. Since she'd come back from Pylea with them, Cordelia had taken her under her wing and taught her everything about the faster, advanced world she'd left long ago. The girl would always be grateful, she knew that, but strangely enough, she refused to acknowledge the fact that Cordelia was dying. It was as if she couldn't see what was happening before her very eyes. The girl would always look at Cordelia with wide, trusting eyes and ask, truthfully, "Why?" when Cordelia would say she was tired. Every time, she would have to explain to Fred that she was dying. And every time, she would always say "Oh,", only to ask the same question the next day.  
  
Cordelia didn't mind, though. She actually envied Fred for being able to just forget the things she wanted to. She wanted to do that so bad. Just forget everything that had happend the last six years. But she knew she couldn't. She knew that all she could do was hope for a better life when she passed away, hopefully soon.  
  
Cordelia heard the door slam, and she knew who it was before she even looked up to see Gunn strolling into the room, his handsome face a mask of unemotional hardness,"Rough night?" she asked quietly as she reclined on the couch.  
  
"Always." he answered, and he touched the scar that ran from his temple to his chin. He had gotten it trying to save Wesley, but it had been in vain. His hand always hovered near the reminder of that night. It was as if he didn't want to forget it, unlike Cordelia, who did every minute of every day.  
  
"Where's Angel?" she questioned as she closed her eyes, which felt like lead weights.  
  
She could hear him walking towards the kitchen,"Killing something."  
  
That was always his answer. He never wanted to mess with talking to them. Cordelia didn't really care though. More peace and quiet for her.   
  
As if on cue, she heard him open the front doors softly and walk into the lobby. She could always tell when Angel was near, even when she didn't see him. Cordelia didn't open her eyes, however. She only wanted to stay in darkness, had no want to see the weary faces of those she loved.  
  
"Cordelia." his voice was gentle and soft, like that of a melody one hears before drifting off to sleep. She would often analyze that voice for hours at a time, marvel at how much he could convey in just one or two words. It was a gift that only Angel possessed, one given to him through two hundred and forty nine years of existence.  
  
She gave him a half smile, and she felt him kneel beside her,"How are you feeling?" he asked her quietly, but in her mind, she heard the true meaning of his words. "How long?"  
  
"I'm living." "Soon."  
  
She heard him straighten and head towards the kitchen,"Gunn?"  
  
"Yeah."   
  
"Anything stirring up trouble tonight?"It was always a start at an attempted conversation, asking about the night's events.  
  
Cordelia heard him sigh,"I wouldn't know. I killed everything before I could find out."  
  
She could feel Angel tense at Gunn's hostile tone of voice, and she opened her eyes slowly and sat up. Through her blurry vision, she watched as Angel and Gunn stared each other down. It was always like the rogue vampire hunter to go on the defensive even when Angel meant nothing by his questions.  
  
"Where's Fred?" she asked Angel, trying, perhaps, to break through the intense atmosphere.   
  
Angel turned to look at her with his deep, chocolate eyes,"She went for a walk."  
  
"Oh." she nodded slowly.   
  
No one said anything for what felt like forever, and Cordelia laid back on the couch again, tried to regain the strength used to sit up. Gunn was rummaging around in the refrigerator for something to snack on, and Angel was back beside Cordelia again, watching her with tortured eyes.  
  
"The air is really angry here." the small, innocent voice belonged to Fred, who had just entered through the back. Cordelia watched as she took a few tentetive steps toward the vampire,"the air is always mad here."  
  
Where Gunn would've come back with a snappy comment or a smile, he did neither. He never did that anymore. Instead, he only let lose a sigh of exasperation toward Fred and slammed the refrigerator door shut with a bang.  
  
Then, Cordelia couldn't stand it anymore. She just wanted to be away from everything, alone in the darkness of her room. She didn't want the tenseness, she didn't want Gunn's biting remarks and Angel's whispered words of concern. It was all too much,"I'm really tired. I gonna go lie down." she managed to say before pushing herself to a sitting position.  
  
"Why are you tired?" Fred asked without missing a beat.  
  
Again, Cordelia gave her that sad smile that was so often seen around the hotel,"I'm dying, Fred." she didn't go on to clarify. She would just have to say it the next night, and the next, until she wasn't there to remind Fred anymore. Or maybe there would be no tomorrow...  
  
The girl looked down,"Oh."  
  
Cordelia began the long walk to the stairs with Angel beside her. When the climb began, she always needed the support of someone else. The vampire held her up as they took each step. She knew he could hear her heart fluttering like a hummingbird's from the effort.  
  
"The air is always mad here." she repeated to herslelf in a whisper. Angel turned to regard her with his pain-filled eyes.  
  
She knew he had heard her,"What?" He was asking why she had said something so strange.  
  
"It's not supposed to be like this." she told him, and her already weak vision was blurred even more by the tears that suddenly sprang to her eyes.  
  
"I know." she heard his own voice break with the emotion, and she clutched his arm a little tighter.   
  
They were at the top of the antique stairs now, and they headed toward her bedroom. She had moved in the hotel when they had discovered the tumor. It was easier for her to be near the others, and although she hadn't told them, it was the only place she really wanted to die.  
  
"No." she hesitated, and Angel slowed,"your room is closer."   
  
He nodded, and they turned into the large bedroom that belonged to the vampire. With a small sigh of relief, she laid down on the neatly made bed while Angel pulled the covers up around her frail form. For many days and nights after that fateful doctor's appointment, she had slept on his bed, wrapped in his cool, comforting arms. Now, though, she knew it would not make a difference. She would die anyway. She just wished it would come sooner.  
  
"If you need anything...," he always told her this, even though all she needed was to sleep.  
  
Cordelia watched her dear friend. He had once stood strong and proud. Now, he was a man (she had always considered him a man) that had been worn down by tragedy, by loss. She hated what it had done to them all.   
  
"Good night, my Angel." she whispered as her eyes closed on their own. Never before had she said it, but she felt a strange tugging at her soul tonight. She knew that she would never get the chance again. Perhaps it was a favor from the Powers That Be.  
  
Beside her, she felt Angel draw in a deep breath,"Good night, Cordy." "I love you."  
  
She smiled contentedly at what she'd heard through the words. "I love you too." She didn't need to say it. She knew he realized that.  
  
Angel left the room slowly and shut the door behind him, and she felt herself fall away from the world she'd come to hate. It wasn't just sleep, but a transition. She wasn't going to awake the next day to the people she'd come to love. She wouldn't see Gunn's hard features or Fred's naive innocence again.  
  
She wouldn't see Angel, her Angel.  
  
Instead, she would see friends who'd long ago left them. She'd see Doyle's laughing eyes, hear his Irish brogue that she'd come to miss and dream about almost every night. And Wesley. She would see Wesley again.   
  
With a sigh, Cordelia felt the strange lightness that was her soul floating away, and she smiled, peaceful at last.  
  
Good night, my Love...  
  
  
  
  



End file.
